Technicalities
December 1, 2000


*) Some Notes On Our Recent Election...

Like George W. Bush and Fidel Castro, I am a firm believer that
government works best if you don't actually count the votes too
carefully.  However, I swear to god I did _not_ have Castro's campaign
manager working for me when we had our little referendum on this
newsletter.  It isn't like I had my brother in charge of counting the
votes or anything.  Nonetheless I am proud to say that even Fidel
would have been happy about the Soviet-style result: more than 230
people want Technicalities, 10 declined.

I have been promised that there will be an e-mail alias that doesn't
include the Corporate folks, who included all of the 10 decliners, but
until it gets created I'll keep sending this to nystaff.  I've heard
that creating that alias is somewhat simpler than correctly
calculating our utilization, so I'm expecting it some time in 2H 2001.
Meanwhile, my apologies to the 4% of you who didn't want this.

Oh, you thought I meant that _other_ election.  Nah, not as
interesting.


*) So Now You Know

As you may have noticed by now, I'm back from my travels.  Did you see
what happened to the stock market while I was gone?  Do you want to
draw any conclusions?  Hey look, I am not just the most important
person in the tech department in AGENCY.COM's New York office.  I am
not just the most important person at AGENCY.COM.  I AM THE LYNCHPIN
OF THE ENTIRE INTERNET ECONOMY!

How else can you explain that the stock in our sector sank when I left
to go to Venezuela, tanked further when I flew into the forest in the
center of the country (on a DC-3 of all things), fell again when I
went on a boat in the Caribbean.  ACOM only rose on the day after
Thanksgiving, the day I re-entered the country.  Coincidence?  I think
not.

Look, I have been holding this entire thing together for years now,
and you see what happens when I take some time off. DO NOT MESS WITH
ME!


*) And While I Was Away

I was pleased to note that things went pretty well during my stay in
the tropical climes.

Ritesh has started his new ersatz-Technicalities to tell everyone what
is going on in the department.  I am so glad for that.  Recall that
back in the day, when I ran the tech department, the newsletter was
the VP's job.  You are only still reading this because he delegated
this job back down to me after I thought I had finally evaded it.
(Hey - does anyone happen to recall what our stock price was when _I_
was VP?)

Anyway...  Though I am still taking more time off, I did come in on
Wednesday to check in on the projects I was working on before I left.
I am happy to report that they are all going fine.

It is noteworthy that Peter Gluck and Eli Yasnyi have more or less
completed development on the Boyds Bears B2B site.  It's in beta test
now.  There have been no additional buying rules added for several
days, at least.

On Maritz, Yuju Yen and Laurence Hill have really been leading the
team well.  They now have a mascot - a huge cockroach they have named
Archie.  This hapless insect they keep in a jar in the center of the
room.  He (or is it she?  Does anyone know how to tell?) looked near
death when I saw him Wednesday morning, not least I'm sure because of
the incessant shaking and turning upside to which he was being
subjected.  Naturally, the team chose a bug as their icon to symbolize
the "issues" they have been having with their Java development tools.

And the project is on schedule so far, or so I have been told.


*) And As For Gucci...

Right before I left, we had a meeting with our Gucci client and a
rather dour team from Sapient, who is doing the next phase of the
gucci.com B2B site.  ("Ah, yes, the enemy." as Marysia so nicely put
it.)  The meeting was to give the new folks a brain dump on what we
had done and how the site worked.

It was certainly odd.  Those of us who worked on that site are pretty
attached to it, so it felt a bit like breaking up with a girlfriend.
I don't know about you, but in my experience whenever that happens I
don't need to put myself through a hand-off meeting with her new
boyfriend.


*) A Blast From The Past

Ralph Seaman tells me he is returning to the office from Amsterdam
next week.  If he hides the stash well enough to get it through
customs, I'm sure he'll share some with you.


*) I'm Just Wondering

Just this morning I got an e-mail that said that that my cubicle was
being moved down to 10.  I know it _had_ seemed like a long time since
things were shuffled around - it must be two months at least and I've
finally learned the name of the people sitting around me - but is this
really true?  Are other people moving or I the only one?


*) Now Back To Your Regularly Scheduled Program

As I said above, I am still out on leave.  Looking forward to a
December of taking things easy...